Have you tried to decorate a cake before, but fucked it up?
Afraid you will fuck up your next cake decorating attempt?
Feeling like a hopeless fuck-up?
Then this is the cake for you to make to win back your undeserved self-esteem! It doesn’t matter how well you make this cake or how much you fuck it up; it will still look like shit and that’s the goal!
The Shit You’ll Need:
- Fucktacular chocolate vegan cake (This cake has been my staple for years.)
- Vegan chocolate buttercream icing
How to Make This Shit:
- Measure, cut, and stack up your shitty cake. Ensure this shit is stable.
2. Ice the first layer with some of that fuckin’ amazing buttercream icing.
3. Ice the next shitty layers. Don’t worry about smoothing it out too much. Remember: it is supposed to look like shit.
4. Ice the top shitty layer.
5. Add some extra pieces of cake on the side, so you can make a ramp for your shit-like icing.
6. Ice the shit ramps.
7. Pipe out the butter cream icing. Don’t worry, it doesn’t have to look too nice. The shittier it looks the better!
8. Try to write something clever as legible as possible.
Extra bonus step: make lil’ pooplets with the leftover cupcakes or pieces of cake.
Give this to the shithead in your life and make him (or her) super fuckin’ happy!